Following an intense game of League of Legends, team member “TTVdieguy” linked his Twitch stream, despite flaming the entire game. Dieguy’s stream featured three viewers, one of whom was him, the other two presumably being bots or people with terrible judgment.
“You should fucking kill yourself, idiot,” said aspiring streamer and future failed streamer Dieguy. “Why would you gank other lanes when I clearly pinged that mine doesn’t have flash. Are you fucking stupid? Hardstuck. TTVdieguy has been muted.”
Although he died seven times and only got three kills, Dieguy felt as though he was being underappreciated by the team, believing that he had the capacity to carry if only the jungler would get his head out of his ass and the bot lane stopped being such smooth-brained dogs. He also recommended that people drop a follow and hang out. While Dieguy’s Twitch title promised “chill League games and diamond climb,” the content of the stream contained neither.
“I wasn’t really interested in his stream in the pre-game when he linked it,” said team jungler GetTheHecOut. “But when he started constantly pinging me on my first clear, I thought that it might be worth giving a shot. When he called me a stupid slut whose mother should have smothered me with a pillow, I realized that his stream might actually be a lot of fun to relax and unwind to. At the end of the day, I just want to kick back and watch someone who is the exact same rank as me, but with a thousand more games, and full of hate.”
Dieguy’s stream, which he linked in the pre-game and post-game lobbies, fortunately featured a camera, so his teammates could see the twenty-three-year-old bearded white man with delusions of Twitch grandeur despite having no personality and only three viewers on his fourth year of streaming. The brief thirty seconds his teammates spent watching his stream was spent exclusively complaining about his former teammates, and breathing through his mouth as he angrily responded to taunts in chat.
At the time of this writing, Dieguy’s LoL account has been rewarded with the highest possible Honor level as a token of his remarkably healthy behavior in-game.
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