That Was Close: I Almost Bought A Steam Game Tagged ‘Casual’
Have you ever been driving your car and almost gotten in an accident, and then you have to sort of pull over and mentally process how close you came to …
Read MoreTag: speedrunning
Boyfriend Blames Erectile Dysfunction On Bad RNG
“Baby, please,” speedrunner and steadfast erectile dysfunction denier Peter Evans exclaims from the other room. We hear the rustling of sheets before Peter’s long-term (for him) girlfriend storms out of …
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I’m Not Late To Work, I Just Got Terrible Red Light RNG
Okay, listen up everybody! I’m writing this post due to the numerous complaints about my punctuality. I know I’m showing up past my clock-in time again for the twelfth time …
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Man’s Deathless Run Of Life Going Pretty Good So Far
Local man Steven Tolbsky has just reported to Nerfwire that his deathless run of life, which he started on December 13, 1992, is going pretty good so far. Tolbsky has …
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Opinion: It’s Not Premature Ejaculation, It’s Called Coitus Skip
Was that good for you? Because it was good for me. In fact, look at these splits, chat. Lots of saved time, these are going to be tough PBs to …
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New No% Speedrun Sees How Fast Speedrunners Can Go Outside
If you’ve ever followed speedrunning before, then you will know that it’s an ever-evolving medium of video game competition. It’s seldom as simple as who can beat Super Mario 64 …
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Turns Out Dark Souls II Speedrunner Not The Most Fun Guy To Have Around After All
“I’m going to be honest, I think we might just need to call this one,” says Adam Bishop, in a hushed conversation in the kitchen with his friend and party …
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Novel New Speedrun Strat Involves Kidnapping Developer’s Daughter
For the last four months, the world-record Out-of-Bounds speedrun for the original Portal has been held firmly at seven minutes and twenty-one seconds by speedrunner CantEven. A speedrunner by the …
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He’s Not My President If He Can’t Speedrun Luigi’s Mansion
Yeah, Donald? You wanna be my president? What’s your time, pal? Oh, you think I’m talking about some political shit? What’s your time on the Senate floor? Nah, I don’t …
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