Incredible: EA Origin Fails Three Years Later Than Expected
Origin, EA’s answer to the ever-enduring Steam, launched all the way back in 2011. Even at that time, Steam seemed to reign supreme as the one-stop hub for nearly all …
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Shadowlands? More Like Bad-O-Lands: 3 Problems I’ve Decided I’m Going To Have With The New WoW Expansion
Every new World of Warcraft expansion promises to revitalize the age-old MMO, but Shadowlands is attempting to overhaul the game like we’ve never seen before. Unfortunately, now that Blizzard’s eighth …
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New Unreal Engine Creates Gorgeous Landscapes For Goofy Ass Fortnite Characters To Prance Around In
Utilizing new technologies that can quickly render billions of polygons and create intricate patterns of light, Epic Games’ Unreal Engine 5 will be the most powerful version of the engine …
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Ranking All The Metal Gear Games By How Well They Incorporate Kojima’s Fetishes
If you’re a real gamer, you’re already familiar with Hideo Kojima, game development auteur and Monster Energy spokesperson. You’re probably so familiar that you’ve probably already memorized and catalogued his …
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Valorant Severely Lacking In Characters You Don’t Have To Aim With
Riot Games’ new shooter, Valorant, has been out for some time now, and hasn’t been without criticism. Whether it’s got to do with its anti-cheat being too invasive, or the …
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This Hot Cosplayer Dressed Up As A Goomba And I Discovered Some New Things About Myself
It happened to me. My name is George Watkins, and I am an avid member of the cosplay community. Not a participant, mind you, but a benefactor. I support countless …
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‘Maybe I’ll Try A Ranked Game,’ Says Man Hours From Killing Himself
“I’ve been playing this game for a while,” murmurs local gamer Tyler Providence, mere hours before coming to the conclusion that death’s cold embrace is the only true solace this …
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EA Reveals Master Plan Of Luring Every Company Into Stooping To Their Level And Then Suddenly Turning Good
Great news, gamers—in a surprise press conference held earlier today, Electronic Arts CEO and Lord of the Bloody Throne Andrew Wilson announced that since every company in the world has …
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Wow! All 2020 Game Of The Year Editions Set To Include Ziploc Bag Of Gamer Girl Spit
If there’s one thing every gamer hates, it’s the feeling of being coerced into spending extra money. Plenty of us roll our eyes when we see a $200 price tag …
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New Anti-Cheat Software Sends People To Your House To Beat The Shit Out Of You
Advancements in anti-cheat software have been receiving overwhelmingly negative feedback in recent weeks, most notably Vanguard, used in Valorant, and Denuvo, used (briefly) in Doom Eternal and in Metro Exodus. …
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