Stardew Valley Battle Royale Still Super Relaxing Somehow

The battle royale craze has been strangling the market since 2017, but it looks like pixellated farming simulator Stardew Valley is finally getting in on the action. Not its developers, mind you—a modder named Ilyaki has created Battle Royalley, a mod where 100 players fight to the death on an ever-shrinking map. And yet, just like the original game, it’s still super relaxing somehow.

Stardew Valley originally gained notoriety as one man’s fantasy of running away and owning a farm, a game where the breezy countrysides and cheerful neighbors melt away the player’s troubles. And just like Stardew is about putting aside society’s conventions and finding peace in the simplicity of honest productivity, Battle Royalley is about putting aside society’s conventions about murder being a bad thing. Players and critics alike are calling it “food for the soul,” “an exploration of what true fulfillment really means,” and “a needlessly gruesome bloodbath.”

“I previously used Stardew Valley to escape the turbulence of my everyday life, but now I use it to escape the dozens of players rushing to slaughter me in cold blood,” comments one user on the mod’s download page. “Somehow, it’s just as good.”

“Scavenging for loot in a hostile environment isn’t really that different from the original game,” writes another. “You start out with very little, and you work your way up. I used to farm strawberries before I started farming these fucking noobs. I’ve never felt calmer. I threw my Adderall away.”

Battle Royalley is available for download now. We’ll be posting our full review as soon as we can rouse our writers from the high of savage bloodlust, and fish their Adderall from the trash.

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