“Good work everyone, we’ll be out of this godforsaken keep in no time,” proclaimed Shortshotz, the raid leader of the Alliance guild Rollin’ with my Gnomies. As the loot was collected and dispensed amongst the raid, the Guildmaster, Flickmycrit, called over to the raid leader, a pained look on her face.
“Do you see him?” she asked, her voice a mixture of concern and pain.
“Of course I do. But honestly, there’s nothing we can do about it,” Shotz sighed. “We need his damage output.”
Shortshotz’s gaze drifted over to the location of his Guildmaster’s reference: past the two worgen rogues dancing on the corpse of their slain foe, past the human who was throwing chairs and small trinkets all over the floor asking everyone what they thought of his “toys,” and finally settling upon their raid’s night elf hunter Léĝȱĺąȿ and his tiger companion, Tigre.
Tigre looked horrible. His fur was matted and unkempt, and his legs shook as he struggled to stand. It looked as if he hadn’t eaten or slept in weeks. “We have to say something,” whispered Flick, clenching her fist.
With a sigh, Shotz nodded and the two walked past the gnome running in circles, and over to the hunter, who greeted them with a smile. “Hey guys! Did you see my DPS last fight? Aren’t you glad I’m here? I’m about to whisper everybody the Recount stats.”
Shotz adjusted his collar. To be fair, he was impressed that a survival hunter was putting out so much DPS. “W-well yes, but we’re here to talk to you about something else. Your tiger… are you… you know, feeding him?”
“Feeding him? Nah, I haven’t had to do that to keep his happiness up since Cataclysm.” The hunter replied, rifling through his backpack, which contained a surplus of various fish, herbs, and motorcycles. “Besides, if he gets in trouble, I can just mend pet,” he said happily, throwing a few leaves at the tiger.
Flick sighed. “Look. We appreciate what you bring to our team and this guild, but maybe… maybe give the tiger a break? He clearly needs it.”After a moment, the hunter nods. “Alright, I’ll switch to marksman, give him a break.” The hunter smiled as he began to dismiss his pet. “See ya later, pal!”
After his dismissal finished, the tiger began to disappear, evaporating into nothingness, the last look on his face one of terror and existential dread as he faded into the abyss.
“But what about the warlock’s pets?” asked Shotz to his Guildmaster as they made their way to the next boss.
“They’re demons, who gives a shit?”