Our Review Of The Shitty Game You Tried To Make And Then Never Showed Anyone

It’s the game that no one saw coming—or ever saw at all. Nerfwire was lucky enough to get our hands on Working Title 2 during a midnight raid of the laptop that you left on your kitchen table last night, and we’re beyond excited to give the world an exclusive look at the various technical, design, and artistic mistakes that you made while creating this sub-par, not-even-worth-competing-with-asset-flips-on-Steam puzzle platformer that you haven’t even shown to your closest friends.

Let’s begin, shall we?

This 2D platformer follows our main character, a “dragon-born” that uses wings to elevate their jumps during certain puzzles. If players are looking to dig more into the plot, they need look no further—the words “dragon-born,” left with no context or explanation, are the only semblance of what could be considered a plot or even a story.

“Yeah, I thought it was an interesting choice that you made the game with absolutely no direction,” says your game design professor from college, Arnold Becker, who considered you one of his brightest students. “Usually I’d say that maybe you were just focusing on gameplay and satisfying mechanics, not relying on story as a crutch, but this is clearly not the case here.”

Becker wasn’t the only one who was lukewarm on your magnum opus, which was saved on your desktop in a folder called “Works in Progress.” Alongside it was a screenplay for a Rocky musical, which you abandoned halfway through the first act when you found out someone already did that in 2012, and a text file simply containing the phrase “Skyrim but underwater.” 

“I just can’t believe this took you so long to make. I mean, I remember some really late nights on this one,” says your ex-girlfriend (check your phone) Rebecca. “Why did I buy you that digital drawing pad for Christmas? Do you have a DeviantArt you’re not telling me about? Oh, he does? Let me see. Oh, my God.”

The game, which ends abruptly and without explanation halfway through what Nerfwire believes to be a lava level (this one’s red) hasn’t exactly inspired confidence in your game-making ability, and it’s not exactly like there’s some finished masterpiece to compare it to in your defense.

“Well, you can’t expect every game to be a home run out of the park,” your mother says, partially in your defense and partially in defense of the student loans she took out to pay for your CS degree. “I just hope you had fun making this, sweetie. Just don’t forget to work hard at work, too!”

Nerwire gives your game a 2/10, and have done you the favor of releasing it to the world marketed as a fully finished product. Congratulations, you developer, you! The Geek Squad guys at work are going to love this one.

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