New Zoe Skin Looks Great And Not Sexual So Don’t Even Worry About It

In what critics are calling “dazzlingly gorgeous,” “Riot’s art team crushing it yet again,” and “definitely not sexual in the least so you’re the one who’s in the wrong for bringing it up at all,” Riot Games recently released a new skin for one of League of Legends’ most infamous champions: the Aspect of Twilight herself, Zoe.

In the world of Runeterra, Zoe is an immortal, cosmic being—the wielder of cataclysmic, world-bending power. She’s roamed the universe for unfathomable eons, she just appears as a child because she’s like, whimsical and imaginative. It’s not weird, why are you making it weird?

Zoe’s latest skin brings her into the Star Guardian line-up, a series of skins inspired by “magical girl” anime such as Sailor Moon and Madoka Magica. This means they’re dressing her up as a Japanese schoolgirl, which is super fine and we just don’t see how that could be interpreted sexually. It says a lot more about you, we think, that you’re interpreting it sexually.

Some fans are disappointed that, unlike the new skins for Xayah and Rakan, Zoe’s skin is not legendary-tier and contains no unique voice lines. There aren’t even special interactions with other Star Guardians, although Zoe does still make remarks such as “I did not say I wanna kiss you… yet,” and “He was so cute. I mean, uh, not that I noticed. Hehe,” towards the champion Ezreal, an adult human man.

Which is fine, since Zoe is also technically an adult. If anything, she’s too old for him! Unfathomable eons? Guys? Officers?

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