Indie Developer Hoping To Die Tragic Death So That Video Game Becomes Popular

“Honestly, the big reason that Dukin’ Ducklings hasn’t made it in the big time yet is because the market is so saturated,” indie developer Aaron Bardeau insists. “When you make a game as perfect, as unparalleled as Dukin’ Ducklings, you’re not just making a game. You’re not making some hacky, derivative IP that’s going to make you a quick buck. You’re creating a legacy, which will last beyond your hopefully tragic and newsworthy demise. Do a lot of people read your website?”

Dukin’ Ducklings, Aaron Bardeau’s magnum opus, is a game that is chiefly about ducklings that fight. Bardeau insists that this is not in any way related to the popular Duck Game, a game about ducks that fight, in a long tirade that is both too long and somehow too racially motivated to include in this article. 

“You know, Michael Jackson wouldn’t be as big as he is now if he hadn’t died,” Bardeau claims, invoking the name of the youngest artist to top the Hot 100, and the artist behind the best-selling album in the world to date, even before his death. “Same thing with John Lennon. And that artist, Michelangelo? Da Vinci?”

It was neither.

“Yeah, Aaron’s been getting real dark lately,” says Lauren Baron, part of Bardeau’s small indie development team. “He keeps on talking about how one day when he dies saving the Statue of Liberty from being taken down in World War III, and the American government goes to his house to see who this hero was, and they find his game in the attic somewhere, we’ll all get rich off of the royalties. I mean, it’s not always that exact story, but it consistently includes a scene that’s kind of like the opening of National Treasure where they’re in the attic, you know? That part is really important to him.”

Bardeau made good on Baron’s claims by laying a similar scenario for us in our interview. “No one really knows how they’re going to go, you know, but I like to think that when I die it’ll be by stopping the hijackers on a plane that was carrying the president, and years from now my son will be in the attic with my grandson, and they’ll find my game, and talk about how I was such a hero and how they have to get Dukin’ Ducklings in front of the world.”

“Anyway, to answer your question, that’s my plan to grow the studio.”

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