Rough news from indie developer Laser Llama today as their controversial game Abortion Simulator has been canceled only a third of the way through its development. It’s always sad to see a game that could have been great if only it had the chance to grow, patch, and develop, but that is the cost of the anti-game agenda.
“We just weren’t ready for a full game,” said lead developer Kyle Munroe. “There’s just so much work and money that goes into it. If we put the game out, we’d have to patch it all the time, and always be listening to make sure the servers don’t die in the middle of the night. God forbid something went wrong with the game, we might not know how to fix it. Honestly, the game kind of came about by mistake. My friend and I were having a bit to drink, got a little playful, and in the morning, we were shocked to see that we had created the source code for an abortion-simulating video game. These things just happen sometimes.”
The game, in which your character can simulate the entire act of an abortion from being yelled at by protestors to telling the protestors to fuck off and finally having a very invasive procedure. Additionally, there was a planned boss level in which you tell your very Catholic parents that you had a miscarriage.
“This is disgusting,” said Stacey Rheese, founder of the Society For Video Game Survival. “When you first begin developing a game, you have a moral obligation to the product and the consumers alike to finish it and put it out. Even if you drink a lot and do drugs during the title’s development, and it comes out severely bugged and gets nasty reviews, you’re still putting out a precious game. A game begins at pre-production, and it’s wrong for it to be so unceremoniously canceled.”
Munroe later gave a statement promising that future games from Laser Llama would be finished with far fewer allegories, analogies, and satire.