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This Article Would Make Fun Of TSM But We Don’t Punch Down

April 11, 2021April 11, 2021

Yesterday, Team SoloMid suffered an embarrassing 3-1 defeat to Team Liquid. Typically, Nerfwire would publish an article mocking TSM for this pathetic display, but it’s the policy of this publication …

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Community

Top 4 Less Embarrassing Things To Say Instead Of ‘Gaming’ When Asked About Your Hobbies

April 9, 2021April 10, 2021

It’s every gamer’s nightmare. You’re at work—or maybe you aren’t, you’re reading Nerfwire after all. You’re at school in a remedial course, and the teacher goes around the room asking …

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Community

I’m Not Late To Work, I Just Got Terrible Red Light RNG

April 7, 2021April 7, 2021

Okay, listen up everybody! I’m writing this post due to the numerous complaints about my punctuality. I know I’m showing up past my clock-in time again for the twelfth time …

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Community

Eye On E3: Will The Developers Of Cyberpunk Commit Ritualistic Suicide On Stage?

April 6, 2021April 6, 2021

It’s almost that time of the year again! E3: the annual video game conference that is desperately clinging to relevance in a time where it could not be less important. …

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Community

Man Too Good At Game To Play Casually With Friends Anymore

March 31, 2021March 31, 2021

Gaming is, at its heart, for everyone, and while some people play games just to have fun, others strive to be the very best. Unfortunately, one local gamer has gotten …

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Community

Dignitas Employees Trying Not To Look Dardoch In The Eyes

March 29, 2021March 30, 2021

After an embarrassing 0-3 series loss to 100 Thieves, sources report that all Dignitas players and employees are trying their hardest to not look Dardoch in the eyes. Joshua “Dardoch” …

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Community

Opinion: If Video Games Don’t Cause Violence Then Why Am I, Todd Howard, Coming To Kill You?

March 27, 2021March 27, 2021

Hi, I’m video gaming’s Todd Howard, here with a question for you: do video games cause violence? This is something we grapple with in the gaming industry. Does the content …

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Community

Man’s Deathless Run Of Life Going Pretty Good So Far

March 22, 2021March 22, 2021

Local man Steven Tolbsky has just reported to Nerfwire that his deathless run of life, which he started on December 13, 1992, is going pretty good so far. Tolbsky has …

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Community

Opinion: I Actually Did Fuck Your Mom Last Night, We Are In Love And Will Get Married, Also She Sucked My Balls, Please Drive The Warthog So I Can Capture This Flag

March 20, 2021March 20, 2021

Hey kid, why don’t you shut the fuck up? I can hear you talking shit to me on that three-dollar microphone. But guess what? I fucked your mom last night. …

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Community

These Mental Illness Diagnoses Will Let You Get Away With Wearing A Sonic Costume To Work

March 12, 2021March 12, 2021

It’s hard following a dress code every day. Sometimes you just want to truly express yourself, and not all offices allow that. Even when working remotely, you might be expected …

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